Love Is Blind
by MattMel
Summary: Jeff reads a letter from Matt! talk about malemale insezt


Title: Love is Blind  
  
Part: 1/1  
  
Author: MattMel  
  
Email: mattmel15848@yahoo.com  
  
Disclaimer: This story is not meant to reflect the true natures, personalities or sexual orientations of the  
  
men involved. I don't own them and I do this without their permission. The songs within are used with out permission.  
  
Rating: R (I´m not sure maybe less)  
  
Content: talk of incest and slash, kinda emotional abuse,  
  
Summary: Jeff reads a letter from Matt (dumb I know, but I did not want to spoil the ending)  
  
Spoilers: None  
  
Note 1: Got the idea while listening to Uriah Heep´s song Love is Blind and I couldn´t get it out of my  
  
Head, ´cuz my Matthew muse wanted some attention.(As if I never give him any ;-p I love him!) *Love ya too Mel ~ snuggles up to ya ~* I know sweetie ~ petts ya on your curly little head ~ *Me purring*  
  
Note 2: This is also my first try at a song fic, so please don´t be too hard on me.  
  
Note 3: Words in italicsare flashbacks to what had happened.  
  
Words in *...* are song text  
  
  
  
. : : LOVE IS BLIND : : .  
  
  
  
Sitting and reading was all Jeff had done since he found his brother laying on his bed with so much painkillers and alcohol in him, that it would have been enough to kill an elephant.  
  
Luckily Jeff found Matt only minutes after he had passed out and was able to bring him to a hospital, where they pumped out his stomach.  
  
Now Matthew was laying in a coma and Jeffrey sat by his side, reading his brothers letter over and over again, hoping his Matt would wake up so they could talk and smooth things over.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Dear Jeffrey  
  
I´m sorry I did this, but the pain is just to much for me to deal with any longer. I´m also sorry to bother you with finding me, but I really have no body else left who could find me.  
  
It is hard for me to explain what you did to me all those years and so I´ll let somebody else explain.  
  
Here is a song for you Jeff that shows you how I felt. The song is called "Love Is Blind" and it´s from Uriah Heep. Maybe you should listen to it at some point.  
  
*I tried to give you love *  
  
*That was ever flowing *  
  
*I tried to give a love *  
  
*That could be so true *  
  
"I love you Jeffy." Matt said softly pressing tight against his brother.  
  
"I know Matt." Was the cold reply, no little kiss, not even a few sweet words.  
  
Jeff turned around in bed and went to sleep, but Matt lay awake, trying to think about something that would show Jeff just how much he loved him.  
  
Silent tears flowed from his eyes, as he realized that he had done all that there is to show his brother his love, but that Jeff didn´t really want his love. He just wanted a warm ass for his cock.  
  
*But you wanted less *  
  
*Than I had to offer *  
  
*What was I to do *  
  
*I tried to bare a soul *  
  
*That would swear devotion *  
  
*I tried to promise dreams *  
  
*I would make come true *  
  
"I don´t know what to do anymore Adam. I love him and he just wants to fuck. I show him that I would do everything for him and he just looks at me and forces a `Thank you´. I get him the stars from the sky and he just goes on with what he´s doing." Matt said sadly to his best friend.  
  
"I don´t know what to say Matty, I would say leave him, but I know how much you love him so I would not suggest that" Adam said, holding his own lover, Jay, close to him.  
  
"I can´t leave him. I just can´t, Adam." Matt said and went to find his so called boyfriend.  
  
*But you said that love was *  
  
*A game for children *  
  
*Here I stand, a fool *  
  
The four friends stood together in the looker room after a show.  
  
"Hey guys do you wanna come with us to a club tonight?" Adam asked, smiling.  
  
"Sure where do we go?" Jeff asked, almost glowing at the prospect of partying.  
  
"Well I´m not sure, I think we´ll just see where we end up." Adam said.  
  
"Oh ok." Jeff said, just as Jay and Adam kissed each other.  
  
"Wow for what was that?" Jay asked breathless, but smiling.  
  
"Just ´cuz I love you." Adam grinned.  
  
Jeff rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath too low for Jay or Adam to hear, but Matt had heard it.  
  
`Love is just a game for children´ the words broke his heart. But sadly he was used to it.  
  
He wondered why he just couldn´t leave his brother, from who he knew that he slept around.  
  
The answer came just moments after the question, he loved his brother and could do nothing to change that. He could never admit all the things Jeff did wrong, he just saw his beloved brother.  
  
Matt knew that he should stop being with Jeff, but at the same time he knew he never could.  
  
"Let´s go then." Adam said cheerfully, breaking Matt out of his thoughts.  
  
Matt just followed numb as they went to the hotel.  
  
*Love is blind *  
  
*Blinded by love *  
  
*You're all I can see in my eyes *  
  
*My mind says, stop *  
  
*But my heart says, go *  
  
*And oh, how it hurts to find *  
  
*It's true when they say that *  
  
*Love is blind *  
  
*Love is blind *  
  
*I told myself if there *  
  
*Was a chance to show you *  
  
*Just how good a love affair could be *  
  
"Welcome home baby." Matt said tenderly and took Jeff´s jacket off his shoulders.  
  
"Hey." Came as only response, no kiss, no nothing.  
  
Matt tried not to notice as he let Jeff to a table, he had sat up beautifully for two with flowers and candles.  
  
"I made us some dinner, lover." Matt said seductively.  
  
"Thank you Matt." Matt would have rather heard nothing than those forced words, but he smiled nonetheless, trying so hard to make his brother see his love.  
  
They ate in silence after that, but Matt saw the rolled eyes and heard the quiet moans from Jeff, who just wanted to fuck and not waste time on a pointless dinner.  
  
*But love was something that *  
  
*You had never given *  
  
*I just couldn't see *  
  
*I closed my eyes to all that *  
  
*You never gave me *  
  
"That was incredible baby." Matt panted in the afterglow of their passion, trying to catch is breath. "Hmmm hmmm." Jeff murmured, starting to get up as Matt wanted to cuddle up to him.  
  
"Where are you going?" Matt asked, seeing his brother put on his clothes.  
  
"I´m going out!" No word as to where or with who. Jeff left the hotel room.  
  
Never seeing how Matt curled up into a ball and began to sob.  
  
"He forgot my birthday." Matt whispered. "And that after all the things I got him for his birthdays."  
  
*Waiting for my heart didn't wanna see *  
  
*How you played around *  
  
*And how well you showed me *  
  
*How wounded love can be *  
  
Matt opened the looker room door and stopped dead in his track.  
  
What he saw made him run to the next restroom and throw up his lunch.  
  
His lover was fucking some guy from the sound team.  
  
"Why can´t I stop loving him?" Matt asked himself as he sat down on the cold tiled ground.  
  
"Why does he hurt me so bad?" Again Matt received no answer from the chilly room.  
  
*Love is blind *  
  
*Blinded by love *  
  
*You're all I can see in my eyes *  
  
*My mind says, stop *  
  
*But my heart says, go *  
  
*Oh, how it hurts to find *  
  
*It's true when they say that*  
  
*Love is blind*  
  
*Love is blind*  
  
*So blind*  
  
So Jeff now you might know how I felt all those years.  
  
I want to end my letter with another line from a song, I don´t know who sang it but again those words  
  
seemed to show my feelings just fine.  
  
*And in the arms that couldn´t hold me*  
  
*Gave my love to one who told me*  
  
*I don´t care.*  
  
I cared, Jeff, I always cared.  
  
Goodbye  
  
Forever in Love  
  
Matthew Moore Hardy  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Wake up Matty please!" Jeff begged.  
  
Nothing, Matt didn´t moved.  
  
"My god what have I done? Please Matty wake up, let´s talk. I´ll change I promise, but please Matty don´t leave me!" Jeff sobbed.  
  
It was the first time in what seemed like forever since Jeff cried, he liked to be seen as the strong, tough guy, but he was everything but. He was a weak, drunken bastard, who could not show his true feelings and pushed his beloved brother into attempting suicide.  
  
"Matty please give me another chance, please just wake up and tell me what I need to do." Jeff cried.  
  
"Give me time Jeff." Jeff was shocked, to say at least, to hear Matt´s deep but soft voice again.  
  
"Matty you are awake?" Jeff asked stunned, "How long?"  
  
"The whole time." Matt said softly.  
  
"Matt please I love you, please give me another chance." Jeff begged again tears in his eyes.  
  
"I´ll give you a chance, but I need time Jeff. What you did to me was just too painful." Matt sighed.  
  
"I´ll give you all the time in the world, just please don´t ever leave me again. You´re my brother I can wait to have you as my lover again, but I could never lose you as my brother ever again." Jeff cried and hugged his brother carefully, not sure how Matt would react.  
  
He didn´t need to worry as Matt hugged him back.  
  
"Thank you for saving me."  
  
"No need Matty it was my fault after all." Jeff whispered.  
  
After that silence filed the room, until the doctors rushed in to do some more tests on Matt.  
  
********  
  
Over the next year Matt was amazed by the change in his brother. He stopped drinking and sleeping around and didn´t partied as often as before and when he did Matt was always with him.  
  
They both mend their relationship as brothers, but Matt was still reluctant to become lovers again.  
  
Then on his birthday he agreed to go out on a date with Jeff again and he was swept from his feet by how much Jeff had changed.  
  
He was now the sweet, caring gentleman that Matt always wanted.  
  
It wasn´t long after that, that the two had their new first night together and it was all Matt ever dreamed of.  
  
A love that was true and one, he felt it with his whole being, that would be ever flowing.  
  
The End 


End file.
